Yes, “why?” in my opinion is the powerful one in my book.
Yes, Yes, I know “How?” is pretty powerful too, though I believe “why” edges it out for top spot.
If I could have two, I’d take both!
For example, in my mastermind groups, “How Can I …..?” is probably the most powerful generator of ideas. It is a high leverage question if you allow the answers to flow and not judge them.
When I’m in conversation with someone one-to-one, I like to ask lots of “why” questions because it reveals so much to me. The answers that are said and the answers that aren’t, say a lot…at least they do to me because I genuinely care about the meanings.
Look at it this way. If I ask “What do you do?”, it’s a stock question. Even if I ask it with complete presence and authenticity, I can go deeper, faster by asking “Why do you do what you do?”. Even “how” in this example isn’t as effective. “What do you do?” “How do you do it?” are a bit superficial for me. They are, of course, helpful and will be useful questions later, though I still want to go for the heart first and then move out to What, How, Who, When, etc…
- Why do you do what you do?
- Why is this cause so important to you?
- Why does it matter to your clients to….?
- Why do you live in San Diego?
- Why are you here today?
I guarantee you that the answers will always be revealing, interesting and generate a unique conversation that you couldn’t have expected.
Want to move past the “small talk” and always have “large talk” conversations like this? That’s what you get with the mastermind group techniques that I share. In the end, don’t make time for the “small talk”. Start on your path to Mastermind Mastery by downloading the guide at www.MastermindingNOW.com
Experiment with this in your next conversation and leave an impression that you genuinely care which will increase your likeability factor.